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Day 30: More Questions Than Answers

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For nothing is hidden that will not become evident, nor anything secret that will not be known and come to light. ~Luke 8:17

I love Facebook for a variety of reasons but mostly because it’s a place where I can ask questions and learn from others. I recently posed this question: “If you could ask God one question AND get an answer, what would it be?”

I was surprised by the number of responses and the variety of topics my friends want to know about. I’d like to share some of them with you here. What would you comment if you saw it? See any of your questions below?

Here were some of the responses:

Is my son with you?
Will I see and recognize my grandparents, my dad, all my loved ones in Heaven?
What is your plan for me moving forward with work & business?
Will the world be ok?
What is your plan for my family?
Will I see all my family and animals in Heaven?
Are people in heaven aware of earthly activities and do they watch (over) us?
What was the purpose of creating the world and the human beings?
Why won’t he reveal himself in a “neon sign” kind of way so that all would believe?

A few out of the box thinkers:

I already have and YES, he does love me!
Wanna play?
Why can’t I lose weight?
Does my cat really love me or is he using me for food?
Can I sit on your lap for a bit?

And of course the biggies…

Why is life so hard?
Why am I here?
When will I die?
May I have just one more day?

That same night I had a conversation on Facebook Messenger with someone who has known me my entire life. She’s seen me swing from one end of the spectrum to the other and has been watching my ‘feed’ for awhile. As of late, I’ve been posting these daily challenges and asking bigger God questions and even put out feelers for who might be interested in a weekly online Bible study. The response was incredible!

Her question to me was, “How did you get God back in your life?” We were both raised in Christian homes and we both have had to deal with untimely deaths of family members. That one factor shook both of our worlds and created a chasm between us and God. Maybe the same is true for you? Something devastating happened in your life, something unexpected or tragic happened, something you couldn’t explain rocked your world and the response was, “Screw this. I’m out.” And you walked away from God in your heart because you couldn’t understand “WHY” God would allow it to happen, “HOW” it could have happened or “WHAT” you could have done to change it or prevent it.

The pain was so great, the path was so muddled, the connection to God was so fractured, You Walked Out. Whether that was a conscious decision or not. Whether you still showed up in church or not. It doesn’t matter. Your heart was not in it. Your mind was thrown into a state of confusion. Your body put up its defenses. Your emotions learned how to numb out. You began to live a zombie-like existence.

You showed up for work. You participated in the necessary activities in life. You smiled. You got by. You were comfortable with a pleasant distance from others, from your own inner truth and from God. It’s easier to live without emotions. Right?

Yes, I thought so too. For almost two decades I lived in a state of emotionless living. I could love, the best I could. I was happy, in comparison to most. But inside, there was something missing. Some void that was restless, irritable and discontented. Have you felt that way too?

Today is not about solutions. It’s more about questions. Asking the big questions and allowing yourself the time and space to really think about them. It’s in Quadrant 2 of Eisenhower’s decision matrix: Not Urgent but Important and according to Steven Covey that is where we should be spending the majority of our time.

 

Ask God in prayer. Listen to the answers. Not coming to you in a thunder cloud, but maybe in a book you read, a magazine article, a TV ad, a conversation with a friend, a movie. God speaks our language, using the things that make up our daily life. If you’re looking to hear, you’ll connect the dots. He is not trying to stay hidden from you. If you seek Him, you will find Him.

Open your heart, one day at a time. I couldn’t answer the question, “How did I get God back in my life?” I didn’t. He found me. I was swimming out in the ocean of searching striving to find the tip of the God iceberg and I got tired. I decided to rest. I laid down on my back to float, discouraged and disheartened. Distant and DONE. And then I saw Jesus walking on the water towards me.

He reaches down, pulls me up above the surface, holds me and says:

Stop striving. I’ve been here all along. I am here to calm the waters. I am here to give you rest. Just rest. Know that I’ve got this. Trust me. I love you.

I’ll close with this. For all the questions asked above, I believe this could suffice for an answer.

For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. I will be found by you,’ declares the Lord,… ~ Jeremiah 29:11-14

Day 30 Lenten Love Prayer:

Today help me to stop striving. Eliminate confusion and help me to trust in the future you have for me. Let me see that it is full of hope. I know I will find you. You promised me that. I will look for you in the eyes of another. In the books that I read. In my Facebook newsfeed. You’re out there speaking through people. You want me to find You. May my heart be willing and open. May it delight in a timely word. May I connect the dots of my life in a way that is meaningful and helpful. May I stop swimming and striving and believe You are just one word away. I will be still and know that You are God.

Day 30 Scripture:

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I fear no evil, for You are with me;
~Psalm 23:4

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